rewind //02

Too much of our life is spent looking toward the future. We live day in and day out with to-do lists, rushed energy, power naps, constant planning and an abundant amount of “let’s get together next week” on our tongues. We are the society that never stops. We are never satisfied; always searching for more. We are constantly praising and seeking the future, forgetting that one day our future will seamlessly become our past.

Looking around it is very evident that we live in a society that has told us that our future is of more importance than our past. That the “where are you going?” is more sacred than the “where have you been?” That believing in Jesus accompanies a different life—a new life—with a promised future of hope and a violent death of our pasts.

While this is true..I want to change the game, my dears.

 photo: @stef_sjo

photo: @stef_sjo

My fiancé, Nathan, and I have been together for almost four years now, but it wasn’t until he got down on one knee, grinning with life-filled eyes, and placed that beautiful, oval diamond ring on my finger, that I began to realize how much our past—our “where have you been?”—is relevant to right now.  It wasn’t that I needed him to make a next step in our relationship to find this out, but it was because of the step taken that I began to rewind and look at our journey as a whole: the past, the now, our future.

Being engaged to Nathan, I often have to stop and really think. I constantly find myself in a whirlwind of chaos battling the “now” and battling the future—battling the enjoyment of our engagement while all the while preparing for our marriage. So many times The Lord has shown me how important it is to not only focus on the future but to focus on our current season. Friends, I can’t stress enough how important it is to focus on where you are and to find contentment in it.  However, I am also learning that our past is not something we should leave where we found it. Our past is very real to the formation of our being. It has brought us each to our current season, and it has been working behind the scenes carefully molded by the hands of The Star-Breather to get us here. To this very moment. To you reading this. Right now. 

To look back and revel at the generations and generations of things that had to happen in order for Nathan and I to even cross paths is nothing short of a mystery; a divine mystery to me. How likely was it that we would even be alive in the same year? The same century? How crazy is it to think that God has ordained years and years and years of ancestry to place you in the very season of life you're in? God molded each of our pasts—growing us and prepping us for battle—so that, when the time comes, we may succeed in our future. While many of our pasts may be something we want to move on from, we must not forget that our past was equally ordained and built upon Holy ground.

Nothing with God is coincidence. Nothing is a surprise to Him. While our future is bright in Jesus, isn’t it safe to say that our past holds just as much weight? After all, it was His hand that guided us through it. I can’t help but think that as we live day in and day out—planning for the next day, the next week. We are not only forgetting how we got here but forgetting where we came from. In order to completely revel in the power and presence of the Holy Spirit we must appreciate our journey as a whole—the bondage He so graciously took us out of, the current ground on which we stand, and the territory we have yet to conquer. 

So here I am ready to challenge you. What would it look like if we turned our eyes in all directions? What if we became a band of daughters that rose up in appreciation of our past, finding contentment in our now, and staying in constant prayer of our future? What if we slowed down our lives? I mean really slowed them down. Not that we may go back to our old lives where we were hung up in bondage and sin, but that we may revisit our past lives to remind ourselves that we have been rescued.

I pray that you find rest knowing that your past, no matter how rugged the journey, got you here to this moment: where you’re alive and breathing and called. 

Cue the music; let’s celebrate. Your faith has made you well!

-Stefanie